Obituary for Patricia Stevens Verboom Patricia Ruth Park Stevens Verboom Nelson (Patty) was born on June 16, 1925 to parents Ronald and Crystal Park in Mitchell, South Dakota. The youngest of three, her siblings were less than thrilled with her arrival. In fact, they tried to convince her that she was actually the third triplet to a pair of twin classmates who consistently ranked last in second grade.
Her parents provided a loving and secure home, shielding the young family from the hardships of the Depression. Her father worked as a railway mail clerk, but the three grew up and left home without ever realizing that they were not “well off”. These formative years instilled in her the strong Park family values that have been the foundation of subsequent generations – integrity, honesty, tolerance and the duty to serve others.
Patty left for college as her male classmates set off to war in Europe and the Pacific. She spent two years at Macalester College in Saint Paul, Minnesota. Nearing the end of her second year, her brother’s close friend and comrade in arms, Myron aka “Steve” paid her a visit.
They married six months later. The scene for the next 11 years was set in South Dakota, with the birth of Rebecca followed by that of Mary 4 years later. Their family home had been towed in from the far country side, totally refurbished and became their beloved ‘red house’.
Pat’s life was post-war picture perfect, surrounded by extended family and friends, with the girls growing happily, despite their frequent sibling bickering. These years of tranquility were suddenly and tragically interrupted by the death of Steve, leaving Pat a widow at age 31. Despite her own profound loss, she found the motivation and resilience to engage in a new career and moved with her two very young girls to Vermont.
Thus began her cosmopolitan life, as she joined The Experiment In International Living, a not-for-profit organization which fostered peace through understanding in a post-war world. Through their shared passion for this mission, she met her second husband, Al, a Belgian national, and set sail across the Atlantic with her two girls, destination Paris, France, where she joined her husband and his four year-old son, Jef. For the next 20 years, home and office were under a single roof, starting with the “mansion” in Palaiseau, offices set up in the game room, stencil machine on top of the pool table running endlessly.
The boundaries of work and personal life were blurred with a constant flow of often fascinating, always welcomed, and sometimes eccentric guests from many horizons – such as Dr. Bob, the Ouija board king, who ran around the house, pendulum in hand, in an effort to communicate with lost spirits. On a bright Sunday April morning in 1963, the most eagerly awaited guest of all, baby daughter Johanna arrived. Soon thereafter, office and home were re-located to Brussels, Belgium and the constant buzz of coming and going of visitors continued.
In 1966, a family bridge game was cut short by a dash to the hospital, where the last newcomer to the family, Ronald, was born. Pat and Al travelled extensively and yet somehow managed to never lose sight of report cards, dentist appointments, dance classes, rugby games and always came home bearing exotic gifts. Nightly family dinners provided the opportunity for all to come together to discuss topics ranging from the activities of our day to world events whether it be in English, French, or sometimes even Dutch.
1980 saw a return to the United States and a job at a small college in Maine as Foreign Student Advisor to a group of mostly Middle-Easterners, Greeks and a bona fide African princess, some of whom were also frequent guests in yet another very large house. Ever one to embrace a challenge, Pat signed up for and excelled in a computer programming class, with the purpose of keeping up with changing times! As the enrollment in Nasson College dwindled, the Foreign Student Advisor program was eliminated, and the family moved back to Brattleboro Vermont to share a house with Pat’s sister.
This was Patricia’s homecoming. She engaged in the community through volunteer work at the court house and hospital and carried out the trusted duties of Treasurer at Centre Church. The New England Drive house became the hub for the extended Verboom & Allen families, the site of many celebrations and family gatherings: summer meals on the screened in porch and snowy Christmases by the fireplace.
In 1985, she was widowed for the second time. Pat and her sister Jean continued to live in the family house in Brattleboro in relative harmony, until Jean passed away some 15 years later. Despite visits to and from her children and grand-children, these were years of solitude, which came to an end after a date on New Year’s Eve with a church acquaintance.
She and Dick wed in September 2003 and together, they continued Pat’s lifelong habit of opening her home to family and friends. They shared a love of travel, and a profound commitment to their midwestern values. After Dick retired and Pat grew weary of cooking evening meals, with the harsh Vermont winters becoming an insurmountable challenge, they made the difficult decision to leave that state.
They settled into a senior living facility in Texas, near Pat’s only state side family. The highlights of their final years together were again visits from children and grandchildren, and Pat never had to cook another meal. This brief narrative captures only a glimpse of the true essence of our family matriarch.
On July 22nd, 2018 she passed away, after a slow two-year retreat into her own private world. She will be forever missed, but the memory of who she was will keep her alive in our hearts. We will never forget this selfless, loving, loyal, opinionated, witty, bold, caring woman who was our Mother and Grandmother.
Pat’s family will gather on August 15th, at St Idesbald on the North Sea, to celebrate her life and to scatter the ashes. In lieu of flowers, donations can be made to: The Epilepsy Foundation at donate. epilepsy.com/donate, Habitat for Humanity at www.
habitat.org/donate/? keyword=header or the ACLU at action. aclu.org/give/make-gift-aclu-someones-memory?
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